A Story About Intentional Dating & Romantic Connection
He called a week ahead, told me the vibe, sent a song the morning of, and showed up with intention. 💋
He’d mentioned before that he hadn’t been on a good, planned-out date in a minute — but when he did, he wanted to take me. At first, he said, “I don’t want to cause pressure and ask you out on a date, but we can hang.” I said, “Why not a date?” and he said, “Cool — let me take you on a date then.” 😏
We’d hung out years ago but never gone on an actual date. So, when he called and said, “Save this date, clear your calendar from 7 to 10. More details later,” I couldn’t help but smile. It wasn’t a long conversation, but it said everything.
Of course, I wanted to know — do I need to dress up or down? 👀 He just laughed and told me he’d let me know later.
A few days passed, and instead of calling or texting (even though he has my number!), he slid into my DMs with the address, time, and attire: semi-formal. Say less. I love dressing up. 💃🏾
Now fast-forward to the morning of the date — and let me say this first, we are what I like to call a “Reel Relationship.” 😂 We send each other funny, wild, and inspirational reels all the time. Sometimes he even types out prayers over me. I truly appreciate that — that covering, that softness in his words.
But this morning hit different. He texted early, saying he woke up thinking about our date and how excited he was — and baby, he attached Luther Vandross’ “Take You Out.” 🎶 I smiled from ear to ear. That was thoughtful, sweet, and honestly a little heart-melting—it set the tone for my day.
By 3:30pm, I was ready to go home. My sister Inger was on DUO helping me pick between two looks, and yes, I made sure to get my power nap in — because if I want to be in a good mood, that nap is non-negotiable. 😴😂
I wanted to feel beautiful, but also for him to see me as beautiful — because I took my time getting ready, okay!
We didn’t talk that day outside of that morning text, which honestly built the anticipation. Around 6:45, he texted while driving (not the best idea 😅) to say he was running about 10 minutes behind. I told him I was five minutes away. Perfect timing.
When I parked and started to cross the street, I heard, “If you don’t wait until I come and get you, woman!” Whew. At 48 years old, I had butterflies. 🦋 In that moment, I felt noticed. Valued. Safe.
He walked up, looked me over, and said, “Wow, is this your semi-formal?” I laughed, “I got some flats in the car.” And he said, “Heck Nawl, you look perfect — wow, you’re beautiful. I feel like I need to go change.” 😂
From that moment on, he held my hand every time we moved.
The place he picked was having a grand opening — beautiful ambiance, great energy, and even better lighting (you know I noticed that 😂). He’d already talked to the staff beforehand, asked about menu options, and even checked if I had any food allergies. Thoughtful. Intentional. The kind of details that make you exhale.
Then came a moment I’ll never forget. He asked to take pictures.
Now, I haven’t told him this part — but in my past, I’ve been with men who tried to make me feel small on purpose. Who didn’t compliment me. Who acted like taking a picture with me was too much to ask. Eventually, I stopped asking — because it hurt more to hear “why” than to just stay quiet.
So, when he said, “You’re really going to take a picture of the bread and not us first? Girl, if you don’t come over here,” I froze a little inside. Because that was the first time in a long time, I felt seen — without having to ask to be.
And baby, when I tell you God knew I needed that? 🙏🏾 That little moment reminded me I never had to shrink again — I just needed someone who could see me as I am.
And then, as if the universe was showing out, there was a photobooth that printed pictures. Before we left, he said, “Come on, we’re not leaving without this one.” 🥹
He normally doesn’t eat after 7pm, but he made an exception for our date. He asked what I’d like to try, and when I said scallops with risotto or Mediterranean chicken, he ordered both so we could share. Thoughtful again. The scallops were the win. The chicken… not so much. 😂
From start to finish, he was consistent — holding my hand, walking me to my car, making sure I got home safely, and even sending compliments after the night was over.
And you know what? That’s when it hit me — when a man wants to, he will. Period. 💯 No long explanation needed.
I’m still single and ready to mingle, y’all, but that date? It was refreshing. It gave me hope. A reminder that gentlemen still exist — and that I don’t have to overextend myself to be appreciated.
If I had to sum up the night in one word? Needed. ❤️
Sometimes it’s not the grand gestures that move you — it’s the quiet consistency in how someone shows up. The effort without being asked. The way they remind you, without words, that you deserve to be seen, touched, and chosen with intention.
That night wasn’t just a date. It was a reflection of what happens when alignment meets action.
💭 “When a man moves with intention, a woman doesn’t have to question his attention.” — BrandiJ
Now tell me, After Glowers… when was the last time someone showed up for you with intention? 💬
#TheRedDress #LifeAfterWithBrandiJ #AfterGlowers
