(Story-time with your girl, BrandiJ)
Let me go ahead and pull y’all in real close… because today? Yeah, I’m sharing something I never thought I’d say out loud. Not because it was messy, not because it was secret, but because it was mine. One of those grown-woman decisions you tuck deep in your pocket and keep walking like, “Yep… that happened.” 😂
So listen…
There was a time in my life when I spun the block.
Yep. I doubled back.
After years of no communication, life did what life does — threw a curveball right into both of our worlds. And in that moment, we ended up talking again. And if I’m being honest? It wasn’t loneliness. It wasn’t boredom. It wasn’t even nostalgia.
It was… comfort.
That familiar feeling of somebody who already knows you — the history, the jokes, the way the hug hits, the way the arms feel (you know the arms I’m talking about 😏😂).
And I genuinely wanted to see if things could be different this time. Because I wasn’t the same woman I was back then. Back then, I was young, hard-headed, and trying to love from a place of “my Daddy said…” instead of actually understanding how two different backgrounds shape two different viewpoints.
I thought maybe — just maybe — if I showed up as a more understanding woman, we could write a different story.
And let me be real with you…
I didn’t tell a soul except a few close friends and family. I already knew the questions that were coming:
“Why now?”
“After everything that happened?”
“Didn’t you say—”
Baby, I wasn’t in the mood to explain a thing. 😩
Sometimes you gotta let your heart explore without putting everybody in your business.
So for about seven months, we tried. We laughed. We traveled. We cooked. We argued. We learned. We tried new recipes and lived a little. And let me go ahead and say this gently but grown… the bedroom? Whew. We are not even gonna pretend like that part wasn’t top-tier, life-changing, “Lord I see what you did there” energy. 😮💨🔥
Let me stop before I say too much. 😂
But here’s the truth:
I don’t regret one moment. Not a trip, not a memory, not a disagreement.
That season showed us exactly why it didn’t work back then — and why it wouldn’t work now. And that’s okay. Every story doesn’t need a fairytale ending. Some just need closure, clarity, and a soft landing.
What it did teach me is this:
I don’t want bare minimum from anybody — because I don’t give bare minimum. I give heart. I give effort. I care deeply. And I realized I had spent a lot of my life hoping people would change instead of accepting who they are and choosing what’s right for me.
This time around? I’m different.
I’m more open.
I understand love shows up in different forms.
I pay attention to how my spirit feels around someone.
It’s not just about chemistry — it’s conversation, kindness, consistency, the way we show up for each other on the hard days.
I know now that I deserve a little of all the love languages — because I’m a big personality with a big heart 💛 and I’m ready for love that matches that. But I also want to understand the person I’m with, what they desire, what they need, so I can show up the right way.
And if you’re reading this, you already know who you are…
Thank you. Truly.
For the laughs, the tears, the meals, the memories, the growth, the travel, and yeah… the adult moments that had my soul leaving my body for a second 😅🔥
You’re loved for life, and I’m proud of who you’re becoming.
I wish the last conversation could’ve been a real conversation — but it is what it is. No hate. No bitterness. Just peace.
New year, new chapter… and I pray everything you said you wanted comes your way. 🙏✨
So After Glowers… yeah. This one was personal.
But it was necessary.
Because this is my season of truth.
My season of owning my story.
My season of stepping fully into who I am now — not who I was then.
And if you’ve ever spun the block quietly, kept a moment to yourself, or tried again with a different heart… baby, don’t judge yourself. Just learn from it and move forward with love.
Here’s to the new season.
And to the grown-up version of us that refuses to hide from our own truth anymore. 💛✨